Ellen DeGrammyres

So, I’ve stopped watching the Grammys with anything more than the most passing interest for wardrobe malfunctions and lip-synch fails years ago. But yesterday after tuning in briefly and then turning to my good friend The Internet, to see what it thought, I was pleased to see that apparently Ellen DeGeneres won the Grammys. I mean what else can you deduce from these photos but that The Great Panted One and Portia had a ball and looked great doing it. Lesbians, we are in your music awards having all the funs.

Ellen & Beyoncé

This photo makes me wish they were in a Laverne & Shirley style sitcom where they shameel shemozzled schlemiel and schlemazeled down the street together.

Ellen & Adele

Adele wants to see that sitcom, too.

Ellen & Lena Dunham

I like how they’re both trying to pretend skeezy Willy Wonka isn’t standing creepily behind them.

Ellen & Nicole Kidman

Nicole clearly wants to kiss Ellen, but this is the most her face muscles can muster.

Ellen, Portia & Ryan Seacrest

I think Randy’s face says it all.

Ellen, Portia & Katy Perry

Best photo sequence of the Grammys, possibly ever.

Ellen, Portia & Kelly Clarkson

And then best photobomb of the Grammys, possibly every.

Monday music

Let's be frank, Mondays hold very little charm on their own. You know it, I know it, we all know it. But there are ways to make Mondays more palatable. To make the mundane start of another weary work week just a smidge more sublime. And one of them is music. But not just any music. Because why have any old music when you can have excellent cover music. And what's more excellent than some of your favorite ladies singing some of your favorite (and guilty favorite) songs. Starting with your friend and mine kelly Clarkson singing Sia's "Breathe Me."

Tegan & Sara, "Umbrella"

Admit it, this version makes it sound mighty, might gay.

Ingrid Michaelson, "Toxic"

This version makes me feel a little better about dancing to this song until nearly dawn in my younger days.

Zooey Deschanel, "Wouldn't It Be Nice"

Manic pixie dream surfer girl.

Brandi Carlile, "Crazy"

Brandi could sing me the phone book, but Patsy is better.